me, myself, and i

me, myself, and i

Sunday, February 19, 2012

" on their way"

"I was heading upstate with my parents, I was doing 90 on the country roads. I got pulled over. So this cop, gets out of his car, swaggers over and he says, 'Lady, I've been waiting for you all day.' And I said, 'Sorry Officer, I got here as fast as I could."Everyone now a days wants the one. When is the one coming? I'm sorry I can't sleep with you, Im waiting for the one. One thing about the one, they are on thier way. They are on their way. Sure, I bet your exhausted from waiting, and you and i may have to wait a little long, but they are on their way, as fast as they can get here. So for now, atleast me, I'm running to get there, and on my way, i am bettering myself for my love. Sure call this post as cheesy as they come, but if you are coming from where I am, your tired of coming home to an empty house, spending all of your free time alone and watching what seems like to be everyone in your life getting married or having kids, or falling back in love, hell all three. It seems that helping better myself may speed up this waiting time for me. That's how i feel, im always waiting for that glance to make my heart stop from that special one. So for now, I can rest easy knowing that special one, is on their way.

Thursday, February 2, 2012

Day 1...



The time on the wall said 6:20... My legs on the treadmill were burning... And I had been on it for three whole minutes... Yea i know three whole minutes. Some of you may gauche at this, others feel sympathy, For me i feel saddened, angered, and pissed off. How have i let myself come to this point, the point of being tired after three minutes of walking.. Not running but a simple walk at 3.0. Now some may have given up at that 3 minutes of pure misery. Some would have just kept going, at a slower pace. Me, well i decided to nut up or shut up and put that treadmill on a 4.5 incline. Yea, thats how i roll. And i did increments of incline and higher speed for 45 minutes. I had to push, push, push myself to finish. Today was the first day i worked out in over three years, yea three whole years, 1095 days, or more, without pushing myself to exercise. How did i feel you may ask, frankly like shit. Its funny, when i was younger and wanting to loose weight, it was a huge thing. I would plan out my start date, and it would be this huge deal where i would throw myself into shock, by not eating any sugar or easing myself into it. I would just go balls to the wall and then hit a wall and inevitably give up. As i was around ten minutes on treadmill this thought popped into my head " This is the first workout of the rest of my life". Every work out from here on out will be easier than the last. When i woke up the morning, I had no idea that i would be going to the gym, signing up, and then working out. I know a lot of people that go to the gym, sign up, then go home... Um hello? Did you just throw 50 bucks out the window? By going home instead of starting your workout, your new life in that moment, your not going to start any thing but giving away your money every month for no reason. You may as well just take your money and put it in the trash because it would be better spend there than on empty promises to yourself. Today was just a random thursday that I woke up thinking i would do just the same thing as yesterday. Today was different because I did not amp myself up that " today is the day i change my life, loose my weight, and solve all of my issues". Today was the day I woke up and decided that today was day one. Tomorrow is day two. Saturday will be day three. There will be mess up's, there will be down days, but there will also be a lot of awesome days, a lot of first's, a lot of i told you so... Today I felt moved and ready, and in that moment, I let go of all the if's, what's, and but's. Done. I have one day down, so ready to meet day two. So cheers to day 2.